Can't Sleep

Artist Franz Van Severdonck

Shh shh
she can't sleep
even tried to count some sheep
gears keep turning
no off button
wander far from fields of mutton
back to landscapes less serene
her brain a scattered time machine

what if, if only
constant gnawing
guilt inside is tearing, clawing
thought she killed that wicked monster
still its prey, some days it  haunts her
big mistakes bad decisions
crimson past like scarred incisions

start again forgive, forgive
perhaps some things she won't outlive
emotional ninny, basket case
spilling tears from place to place
wherever she goes
drip drip drip
from leaky eyelids tears will slip
leaving traces streaky face
and that salty, brakish taste

tomorrow, next year
leave the past
things start spinning sick-bag fast
endless list of things to do
don't let them down
they count on you

hush now, hush now
rest your head
think warm fuzzy thoughts instead
count your many awesome blessings
silence worries, worthless stressing
envision loved ones' precious faces
safe secure in warm embraces

oops she's saddened less consoled
those hands too far away to hold
brother over oceans blue
others might as well be too
not seas between that separate
but failure to communicate

she thinks of friends she misses much
regret and grief in losing touch
thank you cards she needs to write
her mind could go and go all night

ugh exhausted
need some zzz's
fuck off sun, go back down please

what to count now?
ducks ducks geese
upon a lake, a pond of peace
feather pillow floating down
grant her sleep or let her drown
sick of swimming she surrenders
sinks to sleep in silent splendor