How it Went Down

ʻōhiʻa lehua, Metrosideros polymorpha
Photo credit: Jofus

My apologies for leaving you hangin. I was out of town this weekend playing hockey in Wenatchee, Washington and ended up with hardly a nook or a cranny of free time to even think about getting online. 

I meant to fill you in on the seizure-at-work aftermath before i posted more shiz about the Hawaii trip. God-willing i'll be able to tie up that loose end before too long also. Ha.

It was nothing short of overwhelming. Initially there was no acknowledgement. I didn't know who knew, or who saw. It seemed awkward, but it was more likely a self-contrived result of my anxiety, hypersensitivity and everyone just having a case of the Mondays. As the day progressed, though, maybe five or six people approached me and expressed their relief in knowing i was okay. A few went so far as to extend their willingness to help if there was anything they could do. 

More than once it was acknowledged that the bond among associates at the company was something akin to family- that i shouldn't worry. Nobody had that terror-stricken, darting-eyed look i've grown to know following a verbal or incidental i-have-seizures disclosure. One has a granddaughter with seizures, and another, a cousin. The latter, a young guy i might have mistaken otherwise as a couldn't-care-less, Joe Cool type. He looked me in the eyes when i expressed my remorse regarding the omission and subsequent, unnecessary fear i'd inspired and said, "Dude, don't even worry for a second about that. We were just concerned about you. Nobody blames you for not saying anything."

Then, as i'd anticipated, one of the HR managers appeared and asked if i had a free minute to talk about things. I followed him back to the office where we met a second company executive charged with the task of employee management. I was still so exhausted emotionally, i had a hard time suppressing the warm, saline drops welling up at the corners of my eyes. (Hooray for stellar first impressions and for putting other people at ease in an already difficult discussion.) They didn't seem too phased though. Amazingly, somebody had already interceded on my behalf regarding Olive. (Turns out one of our customer service reps is an EMT who knows me fairly well, even though her face didn't ring so much as a pixie-sized tintinnabulum to me.) They agreed to give O-dog a shot, and so far, i'd say she's pretty much won everyone over heart and soul. 

I can't speak more highly of the human resource reps. My anxiety was almost crippling when i went in to speak with them, and i left feeling elevendy hundred and ten percent better. (Who can say that about any recent confabulation with the boss mans?!) I'd prepared a page of emergency contacts in advance so they could relinquish responsibility to my sister or another well-versed person on the list in the future. I was awe-stricken when they suggested i not hesitate to enlist the assistance of any coworker instead; that they'd be fine if there was somewhere on the premises i felt comfortable just staying. What's more, they said let them know if there was anything they could do to make a place more conducive to that sort of thing. I expressed my reluctance in derailing any more productivity in addition to my own and they reassured that they've intentionally established depth in their personnel to accommodate those sorts of things. (!) What's more, they said feel free to come back to work later that day if i felt up to it, but don't stress if i needed more time to recover. 

Whoa right? Holy smokes. My cup runneth over. My cupith fucking gushing. Like a beer stein overflowing with the finest grog, relief and gratitude. 

Thank you so much for all your petitions to the powers at be on my behalf. I definitely credit you to my unbelievable good fortune. Thanks for being patient with my glacial-paced updates. (That is retreating and advancing- they're certainly melting faster than i'm gettin shit written). 

Peace and love and wishing sweet relief for all of you facing your day's trials and tribulations.